It got me to thinking about people's perspective about being busy. Spending as much time as I do with young people, college students and other parents, I have noticed a trend in that people are constantly worried about how busy they are. Here are some things that have helped me gain better perspective:
How do you a live a full life and not allow yourself to become overwhelmed?
1.) Change your vocabulary. Some people just want to tell others how busy they are. Sometimes thier motivations are that they want others to realize all that they are doing, othertimes, they are worried that they are taking on too much. How do you know if you are doing too much? How do you know what to add and what to take out?
When we decide whether to add an activity the first thing we do is to judge whether it will help us pursue kingdom purpose, or make it more difficult? There have been times, when we chose an activity that would make our lives challenging, but they were for a short season, and we were determined not to allow the activity to keep us from what we were called to, and we didn't. For instance, we decided to take the kids to swimming lessons, it was 2 times a week for a month. Each class was 1/2 hour and the boys classes were right after each other. We literally had to run out of class to make it to our departmen leader meetings on Tuesdays, but we did it. The kids enjoyed it, and we did not allow it to stress us out. We were determined to make it work, because it was for a short season, we would not have done it for any longer than we did though!
For us, if it will make life stressful, and is not connected to kingdom purpose, and doesn't benefit the family as a whole, we usually choose not to do it.
I am baffled at how many people think being busy is a bad thing. What is your alternative? Being idle? Busy does not need to equate with stress, if it does in YOUR life, you are either busy doing things that don't fufill the purpose God has for you, or your perspective needs to change. You Should be tired by the end of the day! If you are not, you are not living life to it's full potential. Especially if you have children, and young children at that, you should expect to go to bed, needing to sleep! Yes, there are times to relax, take it easy and lounge around, but the majority of your time, should be spent doing something significant.
2.) Make better choices with your time. I know when I feel like I have too much to do, i can usually look back on my day and see where I really misspent some of my time. Whether it was getting caught up in facebook, or playing a game, or watching tv, i can usually trace it back to spending it on some sort of entertainment for myself. Not that entertainment is inherently bad, it is nice to cuddle up with one you love, and watch a movie but if you allow entertainment to be a priority in your life, it will become a waste of your precious time.
I do believe getting rest, helps with perspective, your emotions and your propensity to deal with stress, if you consistently choose "unwinding" in front of the tv for hours, instead of going to bed, you will feel stressed out, you will feel overwhelmed and you will be exhuasted, all of the time!
Also, learn to say no. When it comes to adding activities to your day, whether it be a sport for your children, guitar lessons, or another play group wants you to join, you need to constantly be looking at the bigger picture. If playing soccer will interfere with your ultimate goals in life, why would you even place your child on the team? Unless you feel like that particular sport is connected to your child's call in life, it should always be low on the list of priorities, especially if you have a full schedule, and are having problems dealing with your current activities. If your concerned about keeping your children active, it may serve you better to do something as a family, that benefits the entire family at once, and spends less of your precious time.
3.) Don't compartmentalize your life! Over the summer, Will and I spent every "Date Night" at Youth America Summer camps. And they were some of the best Date Nights we've had. Many people live thier lives so compartmentalized that it is hard to function. They have date night, family night, church night.. and they don't dare think you can combine any of those. We often times invite people over, or plan to meet people at the park on a pre-planned "family night". Why would we do that? Many people would say, "don't you realize how important it is to spend time with your kids?" Oh definently we do, I also realize how important it is to show them what Life is TRULY about--others. When we take the kids to the park, to meet with another family, where our goal is to be a light to them, we may not spend an hour discussing life with our boys...but they see what real life looks like. Ministering to others, right there, with our children 2 feet away. When you live a life, compartmentalized, your children miss out on so much. No, my kids will problably not be the next football or soccer star, why? Because we don't feel like Soccer and Football are a part of thier destiny, and kingdom purpose is much higher on our priority list than extra curricular sports will ever be.
So, when it comes to being busy,
You SHOULD be busy.. don't waste the life God gave you!
You problably aren't as busy as you've talked yourself into believing you are.
If you are too busy, reprioritize, and spend your time more wisely.
Don't compartmentalize your life. You should be a Christian, Parent, Spouse, Friend, Servant, Light to others wherever you go, whatever you are doing.
Change your perspective.. I'm not busy, my life is FULL! :0)
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